Internet Auction Blog

I saw this guys “About Me” page posted on a forum today. His eBay username is “noexcusebuyer.” He is easily one of the biggest idiots I have ever seen on eBay, and he’s obviously never had to run any kind of real business for himself. Also, he typed all this crap in just two paragraphs. I will paste this idiot’s rant below:

TO ALL MY SELLERS

I DO NOT CARE ABOUT YOUR PERSONAL LIFE, PERSONAL PROBLEMS AND ISSUES, THAT IS YOUR CONCERN! I HAVE PAID YOU PROMPTLY, IN FULL WITH US CURRENCY, THIS IS A BUSINESS TRANSACTION, WE ARE PERFECT STRANGERS, I WANT MY ITEM SHIPPED QUICKLY, NO EXCUSES, PACKED WELL AND DELIVERED SAFELY IN A PROMPT FASHION! I DO NOT WANT TO BE YOUR FRIEND OR HAVE A PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP, I WANT WHAT I PAID FOR, PERIOD. I DO NOT PURCHASE HARD TO FIND, RARE, COLLECTABLES OR ITEMS ON EBAY, I AM NOT AN IDIOT. EVERY ITEM I PURCHASE HAS MULTIPLE PAGES OF ITEM LISTINGS, EVERY ONE OF THEM! I AM NOT IMPRESSED WITH THE “BLOCKED BIDDER” LIST THREAT, LET’S BE CLEAR HERE, I AM A BUYER, I HAVE CASH TO SPEND, THAT CASH SPENDS EVERYWHERE, YOU AS A SELLER HAVE AN ITEM TO SELL, YOU ARE SEEKING CASH FOR THAT ITEM, I AS THE BUYER HAVE THE ABSOLUTE UPPER HAND IN THIS SITUATION, I KNOW IT, YOU KNOW IT, LET’S NOT WASTE TIME WITH WORD GAMES. When I pay for priority, And you send by first class, I will neg you because you pocketed the difference. I will also leave you 1s on ALL your DSR ratings. Sames goes if you send me a damaged or missing item and refuse to fully refund or replace the item, at your sole expense! I am deadly serious about this, I WILL NOT BE RIPPED OFF!! ABOUT FREE SHIPPING, PLEASE DON’T INSULT ME BY TRYING TO SHAME ME WITH YOU SENT MY ITEM, FREE SHIPPING. NO SUCH THING EXISTS UNLESS YOU ARE AN IDIOT AS A SELLER! YOU HAVE INCLUDED ALL YOUR SHIPPING COSTS IN THE PRICE OF YOUR ITEM. YES, I know ebay gives you enhanced search results when you offer free shipping, THAT is your choice and between you and ebay, has nothing at all to do with me.

I expect that you, my seller, will respond to my communications, that I can communicate directly with you through ebay, that you will provide me with a DC# for my purchase and if asked for it, will respond quickly. IF you say in your ad that you ship in ONE BUSINESS DAY, THREE DAYS IS NOT ACCEPTABLE. ESPECIALLY IF YOU DEMAND PAYMENT BY A CERTAIN TIME. When I buy, I AM NOT LAIDBACK and I DO NOT RESPOND WELL IF YOU HAVE MY MONEY AND GET LAIDBACK ABOUT SHIPPING MY PAID ITEM. SOME OF MY SELLERS ARE NOT TAKING ME SERIOUSLY, CHECK MY FEEDBACK LEFT PAGE, I AM AS SERIOUS AS A HEARTATTACK, REALLY! ONE FINAL THING, DON’T SEND ME ANY RELIGIOUS LITERATURE, TELL ME GOD BLESS OR WHATEVER, I AM NOT IMPRESSED, I DIDN’T BUY FROM YOU IN ORDER TO GIVE YOU THE OPPORTUNITY TO SHARE YOUR PERSONAL RELIGIOUS BELIEFS WITH ME, I NEG FOR THAT, BE AWARE. I DON’T WANT TO HEAR ABOUT HOW MUCH YOU LOVE GOD, JESUS, BUDDAHA OR WHOMEVER OR WHATEVER YOU WORSHIP, I DON’T CARE, I DIDN’T PAY YOU FOR THAT NONSENSE! YOU ARE PUSHY, OVERBEARING AND DOMINEERING WHEN YOU TRY TO INTRODUCE YOUR RELIGIOUS BELIEFS INTO A BUSINESS TRANSACTION, THERE WILL BE CONSEQUENCES FROM ME FOR DOING SO!TO THE SELLER WHO IS SO UPSET ABOUT THE NEG LEFT WITHIN HOURS, YEA I LEFT IT. FIRST OFF, YOUR PAYPAL EMAIL ADDY WAS UNREGISTERED, WHICH FOR A SELLER WITH YOUR RECORD WAS MORE THAN STRANGE. SO I PULLED YOUR CONTACT INFORMATION AND CALLED THE PHONE NUMBER THAT YOU HAD LISTED ON YOUR EBAY ACCOUNT, SEEMS THAT THE PERSON WHO ANSWERED HAS SPORADICALLY GOTTEN CALLS FOR YOU OVER THE PAST FOUR YEARS? SEEMS THAT EVEN YOUR NEW SON-IN-LAW WITHIN THE PAST 3 WEEKS TRIED CALLING YOU AT THAT NUMBER, ONLY THIS WOMAN AND HER HUSBAND HAS HAD THIS NUMBER FOR FOUR YEARS? YOU COULDN’T BE REACHED BY EMAIL. I HAVE THE PAYPAL EMAILS AND THE EBAY CONTACT INFORMATION EMAIL, AS WELL AS THE NAME OF THE WOMAN WHO ACTUALLY HAVE THE PHONE # YOU LISTED WITH EBAY. CRY ME A RIVER HERE, OK! Thank You!